Here we are in the biggest battle to save our very limited Democracy from a corrupting government of Divine Right in Australia’s modern history (and me sitting in one of the biggest dust storms I’ve been in – such a shame that our forefathers found it so necessary to clear the land to the extent they did) and our King is slapping us all down for continuing our fight against his idiocy on a day when people are suffering. Says, ‘we don’t want to hear politicians shouting at each other’ we have better things to do. In fact, that exactly what we do want to hear!

He’s talking about this fight we’re having against these Acts of his gracious God – today its major bushfires, as its been for a few weeks now. He seems to say, that our climatically concerned protesters who are protesting outside of Too Busy Gladys’ Holy House, are somehow traitors to his compassion. Something like, it’s not okay to protest, well we know it not considered to be ok to protest, while good God-fearing voters are fighting these fires and good God-fearing voters are losing they homes and property, and on occasion their lives, we should suspend democratic process until its all over! (Whatever he means by ‘until its all over’) But isn’t Gladys’ House debating an environmental bill that concerns all of us today – regardless of this Act of his God? Sounds as dangerous an any of the King’s miracles. Definitely not a day to let Gladys and our Free Press bury such a decision whilst we pray our lives away waiting for another of the King’s miracles.

Seems Barney the Dunce and Matty the Mop are at odds over whether this Act of the King’s God is just punishment for the sins of Greenies. Barney reckons there a good chance that it is. Matty says ‘nonsense, its Barney and his Nationalists lack of education, and for Barney not getting that water he’s been paid for in on time … Nothing to do with the Kings good and gracious God, She’s doing everything she can!’

The King, of course, is more concerned that the children aren’t getting more scared by all the socialist green tripe and has in fact had a mini tanti today over the disrespectful bringing up of Climate Action while we’re damned well in the middle of one. He’s a hoot eh? So much concern for us poor old buggers marooned out here in the bush on his gift of Newstart. Praise the Good Lord and slap me down with an air dried donkey dick!

However, changing the subject so as not to scare the kids with political science, we have an excellent gov’ment announcement; the people of Australia have just saved themselves a million bucks by not allowing the fools in the regions to listen to the Olympic broadcast on Ole Suicide. Wow! I mean that’s a mean saving – 30% more than Barney charged us for the expenses incurred in his finding and moving non existent water about for his buddies. … And we haven’t yet seen Tough Tony’s expenses bill for the alleviation of aborigine discontent! These sort of savings would have to calm Matty the Mop down a bit, surely? I s’pose that everyone’s just a little hot and dusty under the Armani’s today.

And, something more in the King’s line … I’ve just been given a lecture on how best to listen to the bushfire alerts without distressing the children … This lady says, shh .. act calm, keep the volume down and watch the Act of God unfold on the smallest screen possible, and, she says, put your hands in your pockets and support the King’s charities because who knows, you just may not be useful enough to get a job as an envoy.

” … we have no hesitation that the proceedings of yesterday constitute a great epoch in the history of Australia. The time is going past, and will shortly be forgotten, when it seemed a sort of settled thing that the government should be in a condition of continuous antagonism with the people.” – The Argus August 1853.